Besides your budget, your to-do list, and the fact that your gala is in six weeks?

Hey Nonprofit Leader, What’s Keeping You Awake at Night?

Last week an Executive Director looked at me, sighed the sigh of a thousand overworked nonprofit souls, and asked:

“Can I just get rid of my Board?”

He wasn’t joking.And yes—I smiled, because he’s definitely not the first to ask. It got me thinking (as these things always do): Why do Boards so often leave Executive Directors awake at 2 a.m. wondering if Costco sells Tums by the pallet?

In my experience, it usually comes down to this:Many Board members simply don’t understand their roles and responsibilities. Not because they’re bad people—because they were never trained, onboarded, or even given a map that says, “Welcome to the nonprofit sector. Things work differently here.”

Let’s do a quick refresher on the Big Three:

Duty of Care. Duty of Loyalty. Duty of Obedience.

They’re basically the holy trinity of good governance, yet they’re frequently treated like optional reading.

And the confusion sky-rockets when your Board is full of CEOs, entrepreneurs, and well-intentioned business owners used to making rapid decisions, hiring their cousin’s cousin, and “getting things done” without needing to run it through a committee that meets quarterly (and still can’t decide where to put the coffee maker).

Duty of Loyalty: AKA “No, your brother-in-law’s landscaping business does not automatically get the contract.”

In the for-profit world, hiring someone you know is called “networking.”In the nonprofit world? It’s called “a potential conflict of interest,” and the IRS would like a word.

Most nonprofits protect against this by getting competitive bids, disclosing relationships, and choosing the lowest responsible option. Not glamorous, but necessary.

One colleague told me about a Board member whose husband was custom-building $1,600 bookshelves… for a small nonprofit whose entire mission was sending books to incarcerated individuals. His reaction?“Did I miss the meeting where Target was ruled out as an option?”

He resigned. Honestly, I don’t blame him.

Duty of Obedience: The “Follow the Donor’s Instructions” Rule

Another leader told me she nearly quit after her Board tried to redirect a large foundation grant—intended for a preschool playground—into remodeling the kitchen instead.

Creative? Yes.Allowed? Absolutely not.

Ignoring donor restrictions is a fast track to losing grant funding and your credibility.

And Then There’s the IRS (Which Has Opinions, Trust Me)

A charming community music nonprofit nearly lost its charitable status for hosting campaign rallies for a beloved donor running for city council. Heartwarming? Yes.Legal? No.

Political campaigning is prohibited—no exceptions, no “but it’s just a little sign,” no “but we love them so much!”

Another school learned the hard way that renting their gorgeous outdoor space for weddings was so lucrative that the IRS thought they were becoming… a wedding venue.

Unrelated Business Income is real, and when it gets too big, the IRS begins to wonder what your actual mission is.

So Why Do Boards Get Themselves (and You) Into These Situations?

Simple: We don’t train them.

We wouldn’t hire staff without onboarding and training, yet somehow we expect Board members to instinctively understand nonprofit law, governance, ethics, fundraising, and fiduciary duty.

Then we’re surprised when they… don’t.

Board members want to do good.We just have to set them up for success—not sleeplessness.

If This Sounds Like Your Board… Take a Deep Breath

You’re not alone.Nothing is broken beyond repair. And no, you can’t just “get rid of” your Board—tempting as it may be at 2:17 a.m. But you can educate them.You can strengthen them. And you can sleep more peacefully once they understand how to help your organization—not accidentally endanger it.

Ready for a Better Night’s Sleep?

If your Board needs clarity, training, or a gentle-but-firm realignment with proper governance, I can help. I design custom, practical, engaging Board trainings that meet your organization exactly where it is.

Let’s turn your Board into the strong, strategic partner it’s meant to be.

Reach out and let’s talk. Your future well-rested self will thank you.